A leading-edge, CCAF-funded program for dads strengthens the whole family.
Darius* felt overwhelmed. He was divorced and facing assault charges after a physical altercation with his ex-wife. Emotions kept swirling through him: anger and disappointment with himself, sadness about the end of his relationship, and anxiety about how to parent his kids during their visits with him. (His ex-wife had always been the nurturer.) Then the Catholic Children’s Aid Society of Toronto (CCAS) offered vital support through their Male Engagement program, funded by the Catholic Children’s Aid Foundation (CCAF).
Kelvin Asamoah-Brempong, a CCAS Child Protection Worker, connected with Darius, providing one-on-one counseling and enrolling him in the “Being a Dad” program, focusing on parenting skills and emotional intelligence.
Connecting fathers with vital resources
The program and the support of a male worker was a game-changer for Darius and other fathers, says Asamoah-Brempong. “Some of these men have trauma themselves. They often begin the program by blaming everyone. Then they begin to understand how they could have done better, and by the end, they’re asking for ongoing support.”
CCAF funded the 18-month Male Engagement Worker Pilot program based on data indicating that child welfare workers don’t often consult fathers and male caregivers, despite the important role they can play in children’s development. The tendency to exclude men from family case planning and decision-making is even more pronounced when the male caregiver has been abusive.
Addressing trauma and reducing violence
The new male-engagement approach includes dedicated male staff providing timely, anti-racist, and trauma-informed support, essential in reducing children’s exposure to violence between their caregivers, which prompts 25% of all CCAS referrals.
“Many women won’t leave, so if we can have a conversation with the dad, we’re better able to plan for the safety of the children and family,” says Silvie Sousa-Cutulle, a CCAS Child Protection Supervisor and the lead on the Male Engagement Worker Pilot. “Some of these men are also dealing with mental health or addictions issues.”
“Reducing violence and keeping families together are all things that the Catholic community can get behind,” adds Jim Gilligan, Executive Director of the CCAF.
Promoting spirituality, equality and stronger families
Faith plays a part in this empowering program. In the Being A Dad program—offered by Catholic Family Services of Toronto in conjunction with CCAS—fathers reflect on their faith and values.
The dads are grateful. Some say it’s the first time that anyone has reached out to them. “They’re excited to speak to another man who can help them steer through challenges,” adds Asamoah-Brempong. “It’s rewarding because the program breaks down stereotypes and promotes equality.”
The support Darius is receiving through the Male Engagement program has helped him navigate—and enjoy—solo parenting. He’s listening to the kids more and likes taking them for walks and ice cream.
“Children have two parents who will hopefully be in their lives forever,” says Sousa-Cutulle. “So, let’s offer both parents support.”
*Identity changed for privacy reasons.
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